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ReHash #91.5 - Brown & Stewart, Dayton 5.September.1998, 16:00 Hares: Nipple Rash / Slo PokHer Another very hot and humid afternoon found the Dayton Hash gathering for the Annual Red Dress Hash hosted this year by Dayton. The start location in the NCR parking lot at Brown and Stewart has served as the start for many Dayton hashes over the years. By the time Barrel Roll and Penis Head arrived, several hashers had already started comparing their finery. The pack included Pygmy Hippo Lover, Purple Heart On, Fudge Tracker, Tight Sphincter, Quarter Barrel, Anal Vice, Mystic Blow, HAWG, Greg Barbour, No Balls, Horny Dog, Dave Mann, Jenny Cream, Thumper, Red Hott Twatter, Mary Baker, Steph Stephans, Prick in Crotch, Himen Hog, More Leggs, Sticky Pussy, Scott Buel a virgin, Twist n Shout, Dah Gimp, Neon Knockers, Lil Poker, Sub Human, VMI, Snowblower, Steamer, Lon Ryan a virgin, Donna Evans, Toxic Shock, Tight Thong, Fire Balls, Head Puller, Wedgie, Molly Lauricella, Scratched & Sniffed, Poo Packer, Sucks But Doesn't Swallow, Best Blow, Latecummer, Pimp Daddy, Pecker Checker in a stunning black wig with his own cardboard cutout of President Clinton (Bill & Monica), What a Snatch, and John Meier. Ever shade of red was represented by this well attired, fifty plus, pack along with several shades of pink. Cameras were everywhere as hashers wanted to record this event for posterity. After this extended photo op, Barrel asked the group to pose for the official group photo, since the hares, Nipple rash and Slo PokHer wanted to get the show on the road. Dumb ass announcement were made by Nipple Rash for the benefit of the Sin City Hashers, virgins and visitors. Since the trail had been set in advance, the hares immediately sent the pack off to find flour. The pack quickly dispersed to all points of the compass searching for a mark. After a couple of minutes, cries of "On-On" were heard north along Brown. A check at College Park, led the pack to the right and into the University of Dayton Campus. Students stopped and watched in amazement as 50 plus hashers ran past them in red dresses. Fraternity parties stopped as sound of whistles filled the air. Another check near Keller Hall sent the pack in all directions. About this time, one of Dayton's finest drove by the pack but wisely kept going. I think it was Anal Vice in his red bathrobe and shower cap that made up his mind. The pack traversed most of the campus looking for marks and finally found trail leading southwest across an athletic field to another check at Trinity and Lowes which again scattered the pack. After running up and down streets, the trail was found leading back to Brown St next to BW3's. Quarter Barrel took this opportunity to modify his costume. He charged into BW3 asking for a sharp instrument. Cutting off his sleeves and shorting the hem on his red dress, he charged out the door catching up to the pack. The trail crossed Brown St and entered the Patterson Homestead property and shortcutted thru a nice condo area. Naturally, a disgruntled resident started yelling at the hashers, say that they did not belong there. The pack ignored him and kept going only to encountered a stone fence. Luckily, it was easy to cross, though Pygmy got some much appreciated help. The pack was now on Far Hills/Main St and heading back toward the start. A check sent the pack right to a regroup just north of Old River Park where a large Soccer tournament was in progress. After the pack regrouped, they followed trail into the swimming pool area of the Marriott and then inside and through the main lobby to many dumbfounded stares by hotel personnel and guests. Exiting the Marriott, the pack found a check on River Park Rd and headed north and west. The group heading west crossed Patterson without benefit of flour and had to retrace their steps when flour was found cutting thru the NCR parking lot to the northeast. Continuing across a large field, the pack stopped traffic as they crossed Stewart and headed north on Main St. Another check sent the pack right on Jasper and then right on Rubicon to Flanagan's for the long awaited "Beer Near". Fifty people in red dresses made their day. One patron was observed calling on his cellular phone describing the scene and songs to a friend Quarter Barrel made additional modifications to his dress and made it touch too short in the rear giving those behind him a view of this thong panties. After a suitable refreshment period, the pack set off to the north on Rubicon towards Miami Valley Hospital. A check did not deter the pack, they smelled a parking garage! Sure enough, with only a small misstep, the pack found the parking garage and raced through it, blowing their whistles. Emerging from the garage, the pack found a check and then trail leading north on Warren, heading back to downtown. Crossing under Rt 35 the trail turned left to Main St and then north to 5th St. The trail then led into the Dayton Convention Center, where a security guard held the door open for the pack. Charging through the lobby to the escalators, up to the second floor, past a wedding party on their way to a reception, to the walkway to, what else, another parking garage. Exiting the garage on 5th St, the trail led directly into the Oregon District to the amusement of the crowd and on to the Trolley Stop and the "On-In". After ferrying hashers back to their cars and imbibing suitable refreshment, the circle was opened by Penis Head. The hares were called forward for the normal abuse and the first of several down-downs. Next the virgin were called forward and asked the two questions. He replied Scott and that Prick N Crotch made him cum. Showing that he was a well trained virgin, he downed his beer as if he was born to it. Hash crimes were opened and the following accused: Molly for using a Mother Given Name, Quarter Barrel for displaying his thong panties, Steamer for MGN, Neon Knockers for wearing a dress other than red, Slo PokHer for not wearing a red dress and he was joined by his co-hare Nipple Rash, and Anal for wearing a red bathrobe and he was joined by P Head the other Grand Master since Grand Masters do not drink alone. They drank and after Neon Knocker finally finished her beer, cleared the stage for the next set of crimes. Hashers that have not hashed with both Sin City and Dayton before were called forward. They included Jenny Cream from NY City H3, Steph Stephans from Sin City, Himen Hog from White House H4, and Lon Ryan from Sin City. They were welcomed with a down-down. Hash crimes continued with Barrel Roll for having a laptop too near the circle and he was joined by his fellow On-Sec BFH and the other Barrel, Quarter Barrel, P Head announced a naming and summoned. Greg (I need a name) Barbour, our resident Podiatrist, to the stage. He went over some of the suggested names like Toe Teaser and Toe Job but the pack started yelling out names and Fungi was chosen by acclamation. He received his down-down and then a second for forgetting to remove his wig. Henceforth and evermore he will be known as Fungi. After hash crimes had finished, the hares took the stage to announce the winners of the best dressed and the worst dressed. HAWG was selected as the best dressed lady and received a 4-pack of Mississippi Mud. Fungi won the best dressed gentleman and received 4-pack of neat beer. The were given the traditional down-down. Anal won for worst dressed male, joined by P Head. The ugliest female outfit was a real problem. Mary (I also need a hash name) Baker, Sucks But Doesn't Swallow, and Neon Knockers were nominated but tied when the hash voted. They received 2 bottles of some strange beer and the group received a down-down, which lasted a long time. Bushwacker received a down-down for late cumming. The circle was finally closed. The food was served and the pack gorged themselves on chips, salsa, veggies, meatballs and chicken wings while they tried to kill the keg. Sometime during the evening the pack took pity on two unnamed hashers and named them. Mary Baker will henceforth and forever be known as Eager Beaver and Steph Stephans will henceforth and forever be known as Wet Bus Stop. The band set up and entertained the hashers for hours. Much dancing and partying till the wee hours On On
Bob "Barrel Roll" Gray
On-ON and ON-Out, |